Just got back from the grocery store with a small, but most peculiar shopping list: glass cleaner, vinegar, bleach and baby formula.
As I stood there at the checkout, it suddenly occured to me that I was basically Walter White of the show Breaking Bad. In the show, Walt plays a Chemistry teacher who uses his knowledge of the force Weird Science to make drugs and stuff.
Back at the grocery store checkout, a perky, elderly woman stood in line behind me, watching suspiciously as I loaded my noxious chemikills onto the conveyor belt. She eyed me with deep mistrust as I felt her eyes burning a hole into the back of my skull.
Not gonna lie: I don't watch Breaking Bad, I've never done drugs, I've never even tried a cigarette, and my working knowledge of crack begins and ends with a Chef Raekwon album.
But, feeling the intensity of this woman's gaze, I indulged my morbid sense of lulz and I casually turned to her and said:
"It's OK, Miss, I'm just cutting my baby formula".
She was not impressed.